Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
While you were hooking up with her I pulled you off to make sure you knew what you were doing.
You said you were "testing the product for Chris."
I'm a bad man.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
