Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Stop leaving buckets of wine at my house.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
