I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
You need to come get me. I'm pretty sure that gravity's going to crush my brain
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Randomize
