According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
wow, being home for Xmas is freaking weird on tinder. I went to high school with everyone I'm matching... The fact that this many jocks like me now is a huge ego boost from my lack of glory days.
...and I'm done. I just matched two boys I used to babysit without realizing it.
If a clean cut ginger with a flannel and tattoos shows up at the apartment, he is allowed inside.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
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