I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
Both he AND his 17 year old son were hitting on me... I'm bridging generational gaps
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
Yeah. It's a great diet plan tho. Just have sex every time you get hungry.
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
Randomize