why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
Green mimosas i think yes
So after this weekend I think I'm gonna go down on one knee and propose to my boyfriend that he give me his liver.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
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