Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
halloween is SO much better on drugs, why didn't anyone let us know about this when we were kids
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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