that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
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