whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
you threw me on the ground pryed my purse out of my hands screaming " I JUST WANNA HOLD IT A LITTLE BIT". later i found you putting on my lip gloss.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
Randomize
