You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
Was waiting for the adderal to kick in then realized I had been brushing my teeth for eighteen minuites
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
He caught me mid-escape...one leg out the window, bra n thong in hand.I just looked at him and said "Bye Now" n proceeded to fall out his window....then.... tell me why he texted me 30 min later to make sure i got home ok! #igotthis
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Oh god. Charles just fell off the bar. Didn't spill his drink. He's come so far..
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
I will give him this, every time we go to the club he gets a stripper's actual number.
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
