your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
THE BIG GAY MAD HATTER IS HERE AND HE HAS DRUGS IN HIS PANTS FOR YOU. COME DOWNSTAIRS BITCHEZZZZ
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
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