you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
If I die today, promise to let the world know I partied.... oh god did I party
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had sex with him in the back of my car in a duck onesie. I'm worth something dammit.
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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