hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
drunk grocery shopping was not as bad of an idea as i thought, this salmon cat food tastes a lot like tuna
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
Something like; Dear Cupid, when are you going to send me someone to date that isn't a complete psychopath
Randomize
