she looked like the before picture.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
In the pie chart of my life, she is a huge part of why I drink.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Judging from the sharpie on my face, glitter on my chest and women's tiger print panties i'm wearing last night was a thing.
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