Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
I need your advice and before you say it, no, it cannot be solved by a blow job
You clearly don't understand the power you wield with your mouth.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
I probably looked like a mental patient. I had my IV in one hand and cup of pee in the other, swaying around with a dazed grin on my face. I love vicodin.
damn. i can't believe how fast that went from 0 to lesbian
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
Randomize
