Dude I just picked up a married chick while her husband was playing pool.
What do you mean you picked her up? How are you gonna leave the bar?
I didn't. I fucked her in the men's room. Come get me before he finds out.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
It's sad that he has such a beautiful cock and doesn't know what to do with it.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
Randomize