When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
I'm trying to fuck him and feed him. I don't understand why it isn't working.
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
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