Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
No I come to this class stoned every week. Except last week when I was drinking in class
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