I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
More importantly, he hasn't caught an STD yet. I mean I'd say it's luck, but at this point it has to be skill.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?