Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
I wonder if there will ever be a day where I don't find lisps really really hilarious.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
The less money I spend on drugs, the happier my mom will be.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Randomize
