Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
I'll be listening to "I will always love you" and sobbing uncontrollably all night, care to join?
I just moved 6 traffic cones blocking a row of traffic. I got applause.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
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