and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Nothing says responsible like taking your birth control with an open bottle of wine you left on your night stand from the night before
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
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