If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
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