Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
