Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
maybe her throwing up on me was a foreshadowing of how she would later metaphorically throw up on my life
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
The last time I saw her someone was carrying her on a bike and she was yelling that she was E.T.
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
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