lets start a swedish sibling band together
i just got offered coke by a strung out pilot. my night just got a lot more interesting.
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
shattered his nose in 8 pieces. Blaming it on the dog. I feel more guilty about ruining the dog's good name than I do about ruining his nose.
21 Porn Stars Confess What Sex Is Really Like On Set
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
Note for the future: whiskey syrup is AMAZING on 3am pancakes.
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
19 People That Found Pubes In All The Wrong Places
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
Besides. I don't even really like sex because it feels great. I like it because for thirty minutes I own that guys ass.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
When we were having sex last night, I told him I would replace him with tacos