you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
I love having hate sex.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
If you need me I'll be in the hospital involving super glue and fake eyelashes.
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