I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
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