Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
It was like fucking a house. Down the chimney. That deep and empty.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
according to the contents of this bucket, last night i swallowed a whole teabag
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
I've woke up with the same hoodie on backwards, twice this week. I think that's a record
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
Randomize
