dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
remember how i yelled at you for inviting that coke dealer to the party?! i found the $100 bill they were snorting with in the couch.
..new slutty dresses or booze? i won't even waste time with the i told you so.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
They stopped fighting to partake in M&Ms and porn.
Randomize
