I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Randomize
