Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
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