i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
I told my boyfriend that the thing I missed most about him was scratching his balls for him.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
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