I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
Girl last night got so wet when I was going on down her it flooded up my nose. I nearly drown
I'm at my inlaws playing Scrabble. Go Fuck Yourself.
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
I have chicken nuggets, lube and brand new batteries, he can stay at work charting all weekend for all I care, I'm set.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize