I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
we didn't have anything to do and wanted to get our money's worth out of our costumes, so if you see two mermaids day drinking by the creek it's us
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Bruh why you gotta judge
You're awake at 3:30 in the morning RSVPing to a musical, I'm well within my means
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
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