I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
There's a litter of kittens in my bathtub and beer cans everywhere. I want my apartment key back.
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
I warned you. Don't come crying to me when your vagina refuses to forgive you for this.
So you're at your daughter's volleyball game looking at dicks online? That's amazing.
No, I was picking her up from volleyball and sitting in my car looking at dicks.
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
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