he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
You were walking around with a baby carrier pretending your vodka was a baby. You tried to get pictures on santas lap
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
We dared each other to drink Arbor Mist, and I waterboarded someone with tequila.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize