It's like a parade of train wrecks.
he puts the penis in happiness.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
I know, but the fabulousness of my baggies should not be what defines my business as a drug dealer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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