yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
they need to just BURY HIM!
I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
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She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
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She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
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