I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
I sang him a lovely rendition of 'So Long and Thanks For All the Fish", but replaced fish with dick.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
Randomize