i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
I don't think I've ever met a guy with a bush bad enough that I would choose a cactus over it.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
