we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
im tired of her bring homeless men home when shes drunk. THEY ARE NOT FUCKING PETS!!!!
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I just really need a hug and a shower beer
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Randomize
