and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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