I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
I need to hire someone full-time to slap food and dick away from me.
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
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