By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
He sided with his father, so I slashed his tires. I’d say that’s a fair trade.
Randomize