i just sold back the books i vomitted on
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
She just tried to talk over a fart. The fart was way longer than the sentence she originally wanted to say so she just added gibberish to the end. Gross
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
i had fun fun last night, with the exception of you running over my foot with your car. makes a great story for my first one night stand.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
Randomize
