I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
advice for life: when the cop takes your tallboy, don't ask for your coozy back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The upside of Thirsty Thursdaying with the client last night was that he was so hungover that he didn't want to spend time wrangling over the contract extension this morning.
Boss just said I'm getting a bonus for this. Want to celebrate our anniversary a week early tonight?
This is why I married you.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
i need to put some appletini on your dick
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
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