i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
I smell like Dick and happiness
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Randomize
