I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
chipotle is closed for thanksgiving... I am officially thankful for NOTHING.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
I think it's safe to say taking shots on the way to the emergency room was rock bottom. We're going to need to think of ways to top that between now and next new years eve...
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
I have jizz, in my hair. I'm sitting in class with jizz. In. My. Hair. I need to make better life choices.
Looks like taco salad for lunch. I may have died and gone to be better circle in hell than I thought.
Dude I love you. So much. Thank u. I'm safea. In allysi lns car. Mine towed. If u loved me ud leand me 500 in the morning. Sleep on it nd let me know.
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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