Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
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