Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know if it was his cologne or his Jesus hair, but he was much more fuckable than last time I saw him.
Now that I think about it, it may have been the 6 pitchers of beer.
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
I solemnly swear I will not get your boyfriend puke in public drunk again
Now that I've quit blow, I think I'm allergic to my cat....
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
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